remembering my dad

Six years ago my dad passed away at 1:00am on October 24, 2018. I was 40 years old and had so many reasons to be grateful he was my father here for 4 decades. Two days later I turned 41.

Dad faced a lot of medical challenges the last few years of his life, including melanoma, sepsis and pneumonia, a first heart surgery for ascending aortic repair, and more.

His May 2018 heart surgery was successful but he was 70 years old and had complications after, including a brain bleed and subsequent surgery. By late September, Pikes Peak Hospice in Colorado Springs, Colorado admitted Dad, and experiencing such a respectful, almost-holy atmosphere during various stages of death reminded me of the quiet, gentle, steady ministry of those who work there. This was Dad’s work ethic, by the way — encouraging and faithful, very dependable. Some generous soul from Hospice was with Dad when he died. We all had walked Dad Home as best we could.

At first after Dad died, I kept a list of all the things I needed to tell him, what he missed in the girls’ lives, how they thrived here in Colorado Springs again after 3 years in Chicagoland— wishing to hear how proud he was of them, me, and JP.

But I knew he loved me — he told me often!! He showed up to coach my youth soccer and softball teams and volunteered at church and graciously helped people and was a bright and cheerful part of so many lives.

Dad read portions of my first novel in 2017 — and said he knew I was a great writer. He emailed to remind me how he knew — I wrote things that mattered. For a guy who told me he did not read much and was admittedly not literary, and spent most of his working career at Los Angeles County Public Works as a heavy equipment mechanic, that meant a lot to me — he valued my writing and my stories.

So many life lessons from dad still resonate today, from character traits to moral life values:

Best efforts, work hard, be grateful, live humbly…

Dad is cheering on the Dodgers in the World Series from Heaven!